Straight jackets are on your left, meds are on the table and if you hurry, you can still get a seat in group therapy!

Oh...and thanks for stopping bye!!!

Thursday, March 15

Did you ever wonder?

Where the saying “things happen for a reason” came from? I wonder who actually came up with it and what was going on in their life that made them think of it? I did a little Google research and didn’t come up with much. (Actually nothing other than who's said it throughout the years)

I say it.often.almost daily.

More and more I think about my life and the path I've taken thus far.  (I would bet money that everyone has at one point or another)  I have days where I think about what it would be like if I never met my husband and what I'd be doing.  Each time I think about it, I come to one scenario.  Its a sad scenario, but a realistic scenario.  I would probably be a severely depressed alcoholic.  It's true.  I know your probably sitting there wondering why I am thinking this, let alone saying it out loud.  Drinking and/or other extra curricular activities run in parts of my family.  Alcoholism runs heavy through my family on both sides.  When I was 16 I started drinking with friends for "fun".  I looked much older so getting into bars was easy (It doesn't help that I pretty much grew up in bars.  My dad spent most of my childhood in and out of bars.  As my siblings and I started to get older, my mom started spending more time in the bar as well.  Like I said, alcoholism runs on both sides of my family). There wasn't much to do where I came from, so if you weren't pregnant by the time you were 19, you were either drinking and/or doing "something else" to pass the time.  My thing was drinking...and oh, the stories I could tell.  When I met Fred, he was already of age and drinking came even easier.  He drank, but he aired on the responsible side.  It was Fred that showed me reasoning when it came to drinking. I do drink, but not often.  I like my wine and blue moon. I just don't drink it on the regular.  I'm much more responsible.

I suffer from depression and take happy pills.  There...I officially said it out loud here. (Under my profile description I mean it when I say I fight what seems like a never ending struggle one day at a time, and writing about it helps.) Just in the last few years I started opening up about it.  Through the years I've slowly learned that its nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about. If treated properly, it can be conquered. I think its unfortunate.  I can't speak for everyone that suffers from it, but I believe that mine is driven from certain circumstances that occurred throughout my childhood and things that I experienced.  Fred has shown me that life can be happy, fun, and whatever I make of it. We laugh.  We laugh all the time.  My children laugh. We have fun. A lot of fun.  I personally think laughter is contagious. I fight to not let my depression affect my children's lives.  That's most important to me.  I want them to grow up happy and always laughing.

I too believe things do happen for a reason. I met Fred and my life has changed for the better. I was meant to meet Fred.  I know deep down in my soul that God created Fred just for me.

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